feathers n flames

hey future me

i hope to god you feel better than we currently do in like 12 hours because jesus christ im so fucking god damn tired

if you arent having a better day by then im gonna time travel into the future, kick your ass, and then cry together

 heres to hoping i can get a feeling of rest out of the next 2 hours...

wait wait wait wait wait this is too much go back go back feeling too untethered now oh no okay i gotta take a break

(god, the desire for identity does crazy stuff to you...)

- dt signing off

hey me,

so its been a wild 2 weeks hasnt it
probably never couldve imagined something like this happening to you, i bet

its super late here so let me just try to jot down stuff i did today before i forget because oh man,
- spent a shit ton of time ruminating mega hard about the mess i found myself in and have to clean up even though i honest to god have nothing to do with it but hey you do what you gotta do
- dissociated mega hard and as much as i hate to acknowledge it some nice mysterious entity guy took over and wanted to say he wished he could help me more and... yeah i wish you could too buddy and... im glad to know youre there... even if its really fuckin scary to acknowledge that you are
- watched the fionna and cake season 2 finale... havent really processed it. i should watch the show for myself
- had a turkey sandwich from costco
- had a helados strawberry ice cream bar, overpriced (but admittedly delicious as fuck) safeway tomato basil soup
- entered a feverish desperate headspace to make my own accounts and shit (now i have my own tumblr and this dreamwidth account, woohoo)
- started trying to learn how toyhouse works
- started trying to figure out a good way to compile stuff for my creative projects
- *decided* i was going to have my own creative projects
- started brainstorming for an oc which ended with me setting my mind on really making stuff for myself
- talked to people on discord about my maybe past life and wanting to have my own life in this world

note to future self: this isnt chronological
other notes to future self: uhh,

shit, its almost 5am. i should check the fuck out. im supposed to go grocery shopping today. hopefully i can make a part 2 on this with more details

notable thoughts:
i just want to be myself and its looking like finding out what that really means is going to be really really scary
(also... hi, crow in my brain maybe? i have no idea)

- dt signing off